beyond duty 8

LOOPS, (thoughts, songs, things that create a circle and keep coming back). A fundamental cause of addiction, and other malady’s of life. Loops are a functional relationship between what we measure, and what we do, and how that conceives of “did I, or did I not adhere to my own values”.

Once in a great while, I allow myself to be convinced “to let measurements intervene in my own life”/ it never turns out well, in terms of value. Because even if the relationships form a trusted development of fair play, the reality of measuring is: that until you actually participate in the action or reaction of a decision (physical part)/ it is just a theory. Therefore when measuring, you play a game. When acting or reacting: you have now ended the game, and formed a real life decision that does have consequences. Those consequences spill into the lives of others, who then measure; and make decisions as a result of what you measured. The fundamental involved then is: was this fair/ did you achieve the value set out as your decision intended/ did you fail to be fair/ does this need to be redefined, realigned, and rebuilt from the beginning? The development of this reasoning, establishes directional signals in four different categories(directions of the wind). Each changes the functional relationship of your life, with your mind, and its directional movement. So the question is: now that the decision has been made/ do you, or do you not wish to continue. To achieve that, you must confront the reality of where that decision will take you. To understand that, you must account for the decision you made: to be certain, no lies exist.

The question is: WHY? The answer is, best given in this example.
I bought a small tool for a little over twenty dollars about 6 months before using it; it had a thirty day grace period (if I remember correctly)/ after that too bad, unless you buy the warranty. After using it for about one hour of work/ it failed to work properly, but with constant babying it would provide the necessary result. So it was used a total of about 2-3 hours of time. I said “oh well”; but bought another tool the same; could not buy from a different manufacture (they don’t make it). This time I bought a warranty. That tool worked correctly for about 15 minutes and failed; won’t start.
I then went back, got another (3rd one)/ considered the problem; and bought a fourth one with warranty. Believing since the first two failed very quickly, and I want to use this tool, because it does have a value to me (it does a job QUIETER, than others. I have ear troubles): I needed one as backup, so when the 3rd one fails, I can still use the fourth one; while I go get a replacement; hopefully before the fourth one fails too. I now have over $80.00 in what was supposed to be a twenty dollar tool. With no expectation of longevity. I WOULD HAVE, bought a replacement tool from a professional manufacturer; but they don’t make one.
This is the setup, which initiates the measurement: because I still have the first one, which would have been warranted within 30 days, if I had needed it at that time. The clerk, when I replaced the 3rd one and bought a 4th one said: “the same warranty would cover both tools” since I was buying two of the same. Having three tools the same; the mental suggestion is: warranty period is 2 years/ IS IT FAIR, to return the first one; for a backup? A question, which did not exist: UNTIL the second tool failed almost immediately/ which means the factory is using weak parts; not the same problem! So what is fair? We add in: when a tool is not functionally adequate for sale/ but sells anyway, largely to an unsuspecting public, which then puts it away until needed. Many are going to find, their tool does not work; after a very short time: which means they lost money, many become angry, and resources are lost, costing the future. These are secondary issues, which sets up the first measurement: what is fair to me? I am making trips/ I have now spent 4 times more than intended: but I made a decision, to keep buying it. Therefore I have established, “the value is worth the tool, at this time”; because I have a particular use in mind. I need quiet, as possible: “its important”! The second question is: is it fair to the business which does no more than sell the product/ to ask them to replace the original tool, under these circumstances? Is it fair, to let business and manufacturing “go free”/ when a lot of people will lose money on this tool, as described. Which asks the question: how best to intervene, for the future; regardless of this moment? So, I now have time invested in a problem I did not create originally/ facing a decision, I do not wish to make. But stubbornly insisting after the second one failed: if it’s a problem tool, and it is; again, “what is fair to me”? I decide, to take it back; talk to “lesser management on the way in”/ as conversation goes, didn’t get the whole story out, before a decision was offered. They did replace the tool “the 5th one”/ I now have three new tools (two warrantied and replaced, three paid for). Hoping to get about twenty hours of operation out of all three; to get a specific job done. Which means, the decision as to what is fair/ now revolves from theory into fact. Which again enters the mind as the demand for FAIR play; for all sides. Can’t go back now, and make a different decision: this one exists. I can go back, explain better; and let the management of the business decide for me. Which presents an excuse, and demands a judgment. I choose not.

This reality is weighted as “fair”/ however should the new tools have one more near immediate failure: that means this is clearly the manufacturers fault, and no element affects me. Should all three new tools work perfectly and given no expectation of trouble; being “essentially as advertized, usable and worth the price”: that judgment levels to even. We are both affected similarly. If all three tools fail quickly: then the question rises, “does a lawsuit” representing class action status (too many people were adversely affected)/ manufacturer and business; had to know: Need to rise. Time decides.

From this point on, as is predictable; the loop begins. From a mental point of reference, what exists preforms the function of identifying who you really are. Therefore the purpose and desire of where you intended to be, in terms of fairness; must now be justified by the reality. Or I fail myself/ and must rebuild myself, by cleaning out “the trash” which compromised the disciplines which live here with me.
Loops are created by measurements/ which lead to decisions that are not heavily weighted to one side or the other/ thereby removing any and all questions. When the scale of justice “so to speak”, clearly proves this is fair: it is then fair. However, when that same scale is only slightly, but significantly weighted in one direction as opposed to the other: the question erupts, “did you, or did you not attest and define all participants correctly/ or is there a hidden want, that lied, thereby leading to an errant conclusion”?
This is the circle: did you, or did you not (in this case, “me”) measure fairly, and thereby establish the foundation that becomes “justice”? Not pure justice as is a decision without doubts/ but realistic justice, based upon the realities of society that we live within! As you might understand, it is never worth the price to measure; it is always better to be above question! But when confronted by what is honestly fair, based upon the realities involved: sometimes, society needs “lesser answers” than just what will desire, for a life without measurement; allow.
It is these secondary issues which close the loop. Not only for me, but for the demand: we deserve better/ we shall not be cheated “somehow”. Which then seeks the other side, to establish: they must not be cheated either. The loop lives inside your mind as a confrontation for or against you, and may “flip-flop”, giving that a power to control your own experience of love or hate accordingly: until the critical judgment is made.
Critical means: this is “who I am”/ because this is the judgment I accept. That judgment sends your life, in the direction you chose: whether for truth, partial truth, or lie, is up to you. Where there is truth, there will be kindness. Where there are lies, there will be costs coming. What is in-between surfaces as doubt established in the rest of your life; making all future decisions harder. Every form of gray, is more difficult than “black or white”. There are costs, even if you are correct in your measurement: because being human means, “nobody is perfect”. Which then becomes, a judgment for them that may not agree with your own assessment; causing them to enter within the same developmental issues of what is fair, “to me”.

So, if I were a mother: the lesson of this day is, try never to enter within a measurement for justice; unless you must. Remember your duty to society is, “to protect and serve” the values of all, as best you can/ understanding simply, nobody is perfect; grey matters. Sometimes you are going to be less than “completely clean”/ because that answer does not exist. But the foundations which present an argument do: which means, a clear and certain developmental task of aligning facts with outcome must be accepted/ thereby making the future more clear, certain, and sure of going in the direction we each assert, “this, is me”. By, Accepting the fact; you are going to make mistakes too/ whether this is one, I leave to you. The cost of the journey into “who am I”; is worth the price. Because that is the only way we learn what must be cleaned, altered, changed, or embraced as fair.

Regardless of that, loops are dangerous things. They lead to addiction, because the repetition which refuses to leave you mind alone: demands an action, the addict cannot make. A decision, that establishes the direction for the rest of their lives; convicts them; or refuses to rest, until the next set of “definitions/ measurements in gray” must be dealt with, again. What is fair, begins with little things/ because law and justice established by truth and evidence decide the big things. Therefrom fair is an element of society, because what you are willing to do to me as a majority/ can be returned as what I then consider to be allowed for you. Within the category, of where I live my life inside. If you desire peace, there must be forgiveness; if possible/ because no one is perfect, and neither is the concept of fair. Fair is not perfection/ fair is within the definitions of who we intend to be as a society; even if we are not there yet. Consequently fair is an elevation of what we desire to be true. Rather than an immersion in what we believe to be true. That subsequently asks of this situation: did fair meet the standard, “I hope for better, or best; from this world, and me”? Within that standard, I have accepted within this writing, that hope does “live on”.
Adding in: every loop is stopped, when you quit measuring life/ and accept the journey to be “clean”; or, better than you were. As to me, the values and dimensions of my own life, in matters of gray; can be summed up more clearly in this experience.
When I was a teenager, I accidentally walked out of a store with sunglasses in my pocket (hands full, just put them there for a minute/ forgot). But noticed them before I got completely, out of the store: which established a loop of “Oh no, they will think I am stealing if I go back” and a string of immediate “Bad things: I don’t know what to do”. I was completely unprepared; a problem that needs to be remedied with education, for the young. Walked out without consequences, relieved; suggested to a friend “I forgot”/ which he quickly pointed out, stealing anyway. Didn’t take them back; unresolved. Ten years later, after being mentally reminded of that periodically, I went back: explained/ stated up to 20 times more to set it right. Owner had sold/ new owner didn’t care. Nobody is perfect, “everybody knows”, or arrogance controls you; whether you admit it or not. Fix what you can. Live with your decision, by cleaning house; thereby doing your best to fix what needs fixing in you. Pray, if you have faith. But do not simply complicate someone else’s life, “for little things”. That is simply being “righteous”/ it helps no one. These are, the decisions we make: therefore it is up to you, to resolve “life inside”/ changing what can or needs to be changed.


The problem with being young is, “we are unprepared; for realities we have not been educated to deal with”. Little things, can become big things; without a true cause. The problem with being old is, “elements of gray” color our world, and must be dealt with as a fact of life: making decisions, that will become a part of our lives. All the time in-between serves to understand: what we do not know. Or is abandoned, to serve oneself with pride. So the question is throughout life: who do you desire to be/ and will you work to attain that truth? You are going to fail some/ others are going to cause you to fail some/ you are going to cause trouble for others some: the end result is simply being human has a cost.

Songs get stuck in your head because they measure and remind: something aligned with, what you have not yet resolved.


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